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Thinking of how our Teen Son would have Loved Leading the Climate March in NYC!

on Sun, 09/21/2014 - 13:47

 

The Make a Wish Foundation made a strong impression on me when I heard of it a few decades ago. I actually had a good friend go on a family trip  to Disneyland with her cancer-stricken young daughter thanks to a spirited effort by one dynamic woman and others. That took the edge off the sad news that the young girl likely would not live long, and she died about twenty years ago. I saw then that dreaming did make a difference even in the face of the inevitable sense of pending loss

. Living in a small and caring communities whether in the Northwest Corner of CT, New Haven (near Wilbur Cross where I did my second year of high school as well as at ECA--Educational Center for the Arts-- which I got into on a wing and a prayer having heard of the program one gal was bragging about gettting into and then mocking me for saying I wanted to try. She assured me I would have had to apply last year, and having just moved to New Haven , well I was spot out of luck.

Plus I had never taken Real Dance Classes, so what chance did I have in making it into a competitive program  with kids coming form  a number of cities? Well, the little Taurean bull in me loved a challenge and after being a a bit of a gymnast who loved to dance to the music of the 60s with my older sisters and rock 'n roll band playing brothers, a runner and soccer player, how hard could dance class be? When I explained to the couple of people who let me come audition (and this was Before Flashdance, thank you...and much more humble but felt plenty like a dream to me!) that I did not choreograph dances, I just danced with some music playing. I'd later learn this was called Improv and really it's still my favorite kind of dance, so turn those radios on and let your kids (and inner kid) dance around already!"

Well", they said, "just do that". I did and they let me in on the spot! "Okay." they said, "You can come here." I may have danced the ten blocks home, and that was before I had a crush on someone I could walk home with since he was an art student and lived across the street from me. At 15, I was full of dreams and promise and they were coming true as quickly as I could hatch them out. I don't know if they included having to clean someone's house that was perpetually covered with Dog Hair (two large Irish setters, oh geeze, relentless Shedders!).

The  white formica kitchen would be painted with mud and laminated with dog hair and smell. I used ammonia in a bucket of hot water and large sponges to scrub the kitchen cupboards from floor to ceiling regularly after putting the couple's bedding in (which included a dubet comforter cover which again had a carpet of the dog hair I'd have to wrestle off, the joys were never-ending). But back to the amazing part of my dreams at fifteen turning sixteenin May of 1979. I was geered up to go to Wesleyan's dance program, which again seemed like too much to wish for.

As it turned out, while I may have gotten in, I was informed by a family member I need not apply because I would be helping them move and that was that. I survived and continued dancing through high school and Vassar, really in the the genre of Modern Dance (bare feet, hurrah, some ballet and jazz and yes, Improv which I took to my rock and roll dancing times in public. I felt I could dance whereas the public speaking and even writing would seemingly 'do me in' for years, so feel free to pat me on the back in my recovery from those cerebral or emotional blockages. Now, somehow after all that fun and games and reality checks of learning about the importance of protesting at Vassar against Apartheid (insisting Vassar divest funds from supporting the racial divide and injustices in South Africa) and other key causes in the 80s, 90s and into the new millenia, including the Iraq War ).

On Facebook and in various efforts, I have joined with others to address all things unhealthy for our bodies  and minds. Add to that advocacy on social justice causes such as domestic abuse and custody courts that leave childen with abusive fathers, no offense to those really trying to right by their children, and maybe all parents need more support and guidance toward what supervising and caring for youth (and others for that matter) entails. With family and friends and new connections online and in growing circles, I have caught wind of the need to think of the bigger picture. Our oldest daughter, now in her 20s,  took the leadin environmental activism from an early age in their high school communities through Envirothon and even into college while protesting a graduation speaker from Exxon Mobil.

Our second child, Kaelan, sought to follow in his sister's footsteps with efforts to do what he could to address the serious state of planet in terms of the pollution and depletion of natural resources. When he learned about the use of arsenic in the process of purifying gold, he was only 7. He shared at a Boy Scout's meeting his concern but likely that was above their heads at the time. When I asked him to tell me what he was thinking about after a year of homeschooling at that tender age so the schools could know how he was doing, he seriously shared that he believed we all needed to try to live like the Indians did. We were hurting the earth and he really felt we had done too much damage to make a big difference but that we should try.

The best thing he said  over the pursuing years was if we could cut down on population and really try to get off the planet as soon as possibly to give nature a fighting chance. He was a vegetarian in large part to eat lower on the food chain and allow more people to  be fed without hurting the land. That sentiment was shared as well by one of my permaculture friends and instructor Ethan Roland (www.appleseedpermaculture.com). a modern-day Johnny Appleseed hero who searched the world for where apples originated. Turns out I think it was in Khazikastan or over thataway, not too far from China. My son knew my nephew who lived in China too as well as family in Honduras and Mexico.

While he thought my Dad sounded like he made people work too hard, Kaelan grew up seeing his own father work at a nature center mowing lawns and plowing snow and helping with many programs from making maple syrup to doing camps which Kaelan got to attend, as did his Dad. The point is Kaelan knew the gifts of the earth, iincluding the rivers which sadly became a key part of the last moments of his life when he tried to save a friend from the rushing waters by the Falls in Falls Village CT. My hometown became the place of many broken hearts that fateful June 16th, 2009, as school had wrapped up just a mile or so down the road and a group of teens went to do 'something special' with some of the parents okaying the outing, and others not knowing and a few like me having asked other adults to not allow such activities without the right supervision and conditions. While some had agreed with me, they had changed their minds and allowed the youth to have some extra fun on the last days of school. Others who knew of my concerns were not prioritizing them thinking 'you can't control teens, especially not boys' or I was just making noise to delay other decisions in  some family matters.

The list is long and like excuses for why we dont' take time to discuss or dance about our wishes or concerns, well, we can do better. IF Kaelan were walking the earth  instead of being gone five years after his passing, he would be twenty-one and on the run at the head of the Peoples Climate March. His sister Linnea would be giving him great options on what to do with his groups of friends from his hometown area, college and clubs like circus and sports including whitewater boating who could all be part of the soul-You-tion. Maybe that's right where he is anyway, in many a person's heart and mind as they face growing challenges. More power to the dreams and efforts by all of his family who are there, and where I meant to be, but found I was running out of steam to get there and still care for folks throughout the night and for others during the day. Caring for other people is a special needed job, often unpaid, but sometimes compensated with money or trades which all help keep a caregiver afloat if that is needed.  Kudos to all caring for their loved ones, those they are friends with or get to know who need help.

Sometimes the causes are clear and the solutions not far behind. As we pursue our collective dreams, let US-All keep rooting for each other on all level to  maintain peace and balance in our hearts and homes, in our environment and water sources, in our work and living and in our dreams as well, both when awake and asleep. Asking for a supportive caring connection with the greater world and community may lead one to consider the possibility and importance of being connected and even of the divine and loved ones and other healing energies 'being on our side, whether to fulfill wishes or help pull us out of hard times'. Good energy and light stept upon the earth, with a song in one's heart and care for self and others along the way.

Hear some inspiring folk music on www.folklegacyinc.com which was another part of Kaelan's life that lead to being a folk festivals of singing and contra dancing, and much merry-making with people of all ages. His memorial service on youtube.com with his grandparents singing at the end, along with other uplifting moments and songs at a gathering held at his elementary school would be the tone he'd want to see more people allow for facing struggles and being overcomers, a mini or major folk festival. Now with Pete Seeger and many heroic leaders pulling for us from heaven, let's take part in our hearts as part of the soul-you-tion to any problem that comes our way.

We've got this Peoples Climate March as a brightly lit candle of hope for all on the planet and I'm sure those in heaven are cheering for us every step of the way, and Kaelan smiling with his loving 'go-for-it- against all odds undying enthusiasm and many family, friends, and angels along with the divine leading the way.On this Sunday, September 21st, 2014 International Day of Peace as well, why not take a moment to sit quietly upon the earth as explored on www.firethegrid.com as a way to give back to pacha mama and feel some gratitude together for our shared gift of life of people animals, plants, the earth, oceans, rivers, nature and the air we breathe? Ciao for now, bellas!

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